Tag: role

The CEO’s Role Is Changing. What It Takes To Get The Top Job Now

gradyreese/Getty Images

Recruiters, leadership experts and board directors say the path to the top job, and the skills needed to succeed in it, has changed.

The mission of a CEO used to be fairly straightforward. Set the vision and strategy of your company and make sure the right people are in the right roles. Be sensitive to the needs of employees, customers, suppliers and others in your orbit but make shareholders your top priority. Above all else, grow as fast and as big as you can.

But as the world has changed, so have the demands of the CEO job— and the skills needed to succeed in it. Between the pandemic and polarization, climate change and cancel culture, the role has evolved in ways that few would have imagined a few years ago. CEO contenders lack a clear grasp on how the jobs they’re pursuing will change while those at the helm can offer only limited guidance.

What many CEOs increasingly realize is that the change has to start from within. Dick Patton, who co-leads the global CEO practice for recruitment firm Egon Zehnder, detected a mood of deep reflection among the 972 global CEOs they surveyed in a study last year. Nearly 80% of CEO participants said they needed to transform themselves as well as their organizations, and be more adaptive and self-aware.

Part of what’s fueling a new mindset is the recognition that trust and transparency have become vital to business success. Stephen Miles, an executive coach and founder of the Miles Group, argues that the CEO has gone from being the leader who runs the company to the person who must also promote the company’s purpose, impact and credentials as an employer of choice. In short, they must defend the company’s license to operate.

That requires “more influence-building, team-building, people-related skills,” says Miles, not to mention the courage to initiate change on weak signals and be open about their own struggles to connect with people. Emotional intelligence becomes more critical as the demands for CEOs to engage in political hot-button topics mount.

“You have to anticipate whether someone will have the instincts and the intestinal fortitude,” says Jane Stevenson, a vice chair at Korn Ferry who leads its global CEO succession practice. “The expectation of CEOs to take a stand—and to know when to take the stand and when to be quiet—is huge. It’s always been about who the person is. Now it’s who the person is, squared.”

A Need For Bolder Boards

Boards are starting—slowly—to think more broadly about the skills and profile needed to succeed as a CEO in this environment. Experience in operating and running a business is still essential—but a wider range of resumes and roles is under consideration. Diversity candidates are in higher demand, as are traits such as agility, resilience and political judgment.

“Boards are bucking conventional wisdom a bit more,” says Tim Conti, managing partner of executive search firm ON Partners. “The best boards recognize a CEO is just one member of an executive team, and if complemented properly, can come from a lot of new backgrounds.”

That doesn’t mean directors are rushing to take risks. CEO turnover dropped during the pandemic, as many boards put a premium on stability and familiarity to get through the crisis. While CEO openings among Fortune 500 and S&P 500 companies have picked up, most of those slots are filled through internal promotions, according to the latest Crist Kolder Volatility Report of America’s Leading Companies. Only 18.9% of new CEO hires through July were external candidates, versus 30.7% in 2019.

That could indicate more robust succession planning and leadership development—or a lack of imagination at a time when companies need it most. Jim Citrin, who leads Spencer Stuart’s CEO practice, argues that many boards are being too conservative at a time when they need the courage to make bold choices. “Some of the best-performing CEOs were not the obvious choices,” says Citrin.

“Boards basically define success as an internal promotion; failure as having to go outside. In this moment of change and dramatic stakes, all of us need to be creative and courageous.” While the usual route to the CEO’s office is through the president’s or COO’s job, that is not always the best path. A recent report from Spencer Stuart found that over the past 20 years, 85 percent of S&P 500 CEOs have come from one of four “last mile” roles: chief operating officer, a division-level CEO role, chief financial officer and “leapfrog” leaders who held executive jobs another rung or two from the top.

The most successful CEOs were those promoted from a few levels down; the least were CEOs who came from the CFO function. While the latter group knew how to turn a profit, the study found they weren’t as strong at driving top-line growth.

“Some of the best-performing CEOs were not the obvious choices … In this moment of change and dramatic stakes, all of us need to be creative and courageous.”

Jim Citrin, Spencer Stuart

The message is not to discount the value of leading the finance function but rather to supplement it with other responsibilities and C-suite roles. Bonnie Gwin, co-managing partner of the global CEO and board practice at Heidrick & Struggles, says there is demand “for CFOs who are strategic and have played really strategic thought partner roles with their CEO.”

There’s a growing appreciation for experience in other C-suite roles, too. A stint as a chief marketing officer or chief customer officer can be essential for running consumer-facing companies. The chief product officer is also gaining ground as a stepping stone to the CEO job, according to Mark Oppenheimer, CEO of Modern Executive Solutions, as it often “brings together sales, product, strategy and operational responsibilities.” Jeff Christian, who leads the search firm Christian & Timbers, agrees, adding that “product people are becoming the next generation CEOs.”

Perhaps the most common resume builder that indicates a CEO could be destined for the corner office is experience on a high-profile public board of directors. “Getting on some of these major boards is a very interesting corollary to someone getting CEO calls,” says Jana Rich, founder and CEO of the San Francisco-based Rich Talent Group. “You’re networked in a different way. You’re getting incredible exposure to people in the boardroom.”

A Premium—But Limited Progress—On Diversity

Whatever their background, one promising sign is that new CEOs are more likely to be women or people of color. Of the 682 CEOs tracked in the Crist Kolder report, 7.3% were women as of July 31 – up from 6.9% last year and 1.9% in 2010. Heidrick & Struggles took an even broader look at 1,095 CEOs in 24 countries and found women accounted for 13% of new CEOs during the first half of last year, about double from six months earlier.

Racial diversity is a slower climb, although Indian-born leaders continue to ascend to CEO roles, most recently at companies like Starbucks and FedEx. When it comes to the skills in demand for CEOs, some measures of potential remain constant. After studying data from thousands of CEO assessments, Elena Botelho, a partner at leadership advisory ghSMART, distilled the core behaviors for success to the acronym DARE – decisive, adaptable, reliable and engaging for impact.

While the framework is unchanged, Botelho says “adaptability became really paramount” amid the pandemic, which is less about the ability to spot a shift than to immediately respond to it. Resilience is critical. For current CEOs, the exhaustion of the last two years is real, despite it being a job where the median pay was a record-high $14.5 million last year for S&P 500 CEOs, according to an Equilar/Associated Press study.

The rinse-and-repeat series of crises and the dizzying rate of technological change is shifting how CEOs lead, how quickly they’re ready to pass the baton, and what their ambitions may be. While the current generation of CEO-ready leaders has arguably lived through more booms, busts and industry-shattering innovations than the people who came before them, many still feel unprepared. Faced with the prospect of added stress and scrutiny, some recruiters say a lot of candidates also want the job less and less.

They can earn millions through other C-suite roles without the constant scrutiny and stress. Still, for as long as there have been ambitious people, there have been people ambitious to lead. Increasingly, the brass ring is likely to go to those who are ambitious to learn. As Matthew Smith, an executive coach and former chief learning officer at McKinsey puts it: “Leaders who adapt and pivot with speed in the face of opportunities will outperform those who are over-reliant on the skills and habits that got them to the top.”

Diane Brady

Diane Brady

I am an assistant managing editor at Forbes, overseeing our editorial team that runs the C-suite communities, careers, ForbesWomen, 30 Under 30, and related coverage.

Jena McGregor

I am a Senior Editor at Forbes, leading our coverage of the workplace, careers and leadership issues. Before joining Forbes, I wrote for the Washington Post for more than a decade covering

Source: The CEO’s Role Is Changing. What It Takes To Get The Top Job Now

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The 10 Commandments of Salary Negotiation

The largest salary increase I’ve helped get was for a female FAANG executive: I helped her get $5.4M more on her offer. Through the process, it struck me that even though she was a senior leader everyone admired (you’d 100% know of her if I told you her name), she had very little knowledge of how to negotiate. Don’t get me wrong — she knew how to ask and be assertive, but she was much less comfortable “playing the game.”

And she’s not alone.

Regardless of how senior or junior you are, most tech folks struggle with negotiation. Partially this is because compensation is set up to be intentionally misleading. Partially it’s because sticking up for yourself is nerve-racking AF.

Here are the 10 commandments to negotiation I wish everyone knew:

1. Negotiation starts earlier than you think

Every recruiter worth their salt will ask about your salary expectations when you first start interviewing. Do not — I repeat, do not — give them a number.

What to do instead: Ask for the range they’re budgeted for the role.

How to say it: “Can you tell me the salary band for this level? Happy to let you know if it’s within my range, and we can discuss specific numbers later when I’ve met the team.”

Bonus points: If you’re junior/mid, time all your interviews so you get offers around the same time. If you’re senior, get some press before you start meeting folks.

2. Mine for intel during interviews

Go into the interview ready not just to answer questions but to ask some of your own. You will use this as ammunition to negotiate later. Here are a few examples of what you should ask:

  • What’s the biggest priority for the team right now?
  • Why is this role open?
  • What’s the biggest challenge for someone stepping into this role?
  • How does the org structure on the team work?

3. Don’t give in to the pressure

Once you’ve been offered the role, the recruiter’s job shifts from evaluating you to closing you. Most experienced recruiters will ask you again to put up a number for your salary. Clever recruiters may even tell you that they “will go to bat for you.” Yeah, no thanks.

What recruiters say: “If you give me your number, I will make it happen for you.”

What they mean: “I’ll get you something lower, but kinda close to what you asked for.”

4. At FAANG, your recruiter may have no say at all

At FAANG-size companies (i.e. over 5K employees), compensation is heavily formulaic. In fact, there is often a separate team — the “compensation committee” — who sets your salary. They take into account your background, interview performance, and level. They give the recruiter a number to go with. The recruiter then gives you the number, and every time you negotiate they have to go back to that committee to ask for a re-evaluation.

What do clever recruiters do? They get your number up-front to save some legwork.

Unfortunately, this may hurt your chances of getting more on your offer later. It also deprives you of some valuable data — where you fall in the level/salary band. If you get caught in this loop, quickly turn the tables: most companies will consider “new information,” like another offer, to reopen a negotiation. Don’t forget, an offer to stay from your existing company also counts!

5. Read between the lines

Your initial offer speaks volumes, if you know how to interpret the data. Here are a few scenarios you should consider:

Let’s say you’re applying for an L6 role at a big company.

Initial offer comes in low: The team may have felt that you have a lot of “room for growth.” In this case, my advice is to dig deeper and ask the interviewer to share feedback from folks who met you to fix any misconceptions before you ever negotiate. Telling someone you want more money because you’re “the greatest PM ever” while the team felt you were “meh” is not going to fly.

Middle of the road: You got “the number” (the medium opening number that’s basically a template recruiters use). It’s the most common opening offer — companies do this to reduce risk of lawsuits. Over 80% of people get it. It likely means you don’t have a strong advocate on the interview loop. Do not negotiate until you match with a team and you have a manager batting for you.

Initial offer comes in top-of-band: There was likely a discussion about giving you a higher level. Many times in this case, you can push for an “out-of-band” offer — essentially getting paid for an L7 while you’re an L6.

6. At a startup, the playbook is different 

You may be dealing with the founder directly. It’s very likely there is no range for the role, as smaller companies have much less access to salary data. The goal at the initial offer conversation is to understand three things:

That last one can be tricky because you need data the recruiter may be reluctant to give — the option strike price, preferred price, number of outstanding shares — and you need to understand how options work. At last, get ready to ask:

“What is the valuation based on?”

And get ready to not get a straight answer until you’ve asked five times (yes, this is normal).

TL;DR: Ask the questions an investor would ask because, *news flash*, you are now an investor — but instead of cash, you’re staking your time and earning trajectory on the company’s success. You can meet with the investors too; it’s 100% OK to ask for that when the company is early-stage.

Lastly, 2021 has been a weird year for startup compensation, so much of the data from previous years is unreliable. Remote work, abundant access to capital, and greater trust in international talent have skewed things quite a bit. Still, I find the Holloway Guide ranges to be a good starting point.

7. Your job is to win hearts and minds

It can be tempting to think you need to negotiate now that you have data. Nope, not yet. The next step, instead, is to upsell your worth before you come back with any kind of counteroffer. This is especially important if you’re going for a senior role.

What to do next: Ask for follow-up meetings with decision makers. If you’re a Director or higher, you can usually ask to meet with any VP and possibly C-level execs. VPs can often meet with the CEO and even board members. Take your time; this is important if you want your salary to reflect your value. If everyone wants you, you’ll be calling the shots later.

How to run these effectively: Come prepared with three things, tailored to who you’re meeting:

  • Questions about how you can create meaningful impact
  • Ideas based on your interviews so far
  • Bonus points: discussing obstacles to your taking the role and making them sell you on it

8. OK, now get some good data

Did you know that women make only 47 cents in equity for every dollar a man makes? A HUGE reason for that is that many women don’t fully evaluate their offer before negotiating. Let’s change that. Particularly if you are a woman, ask yourself these questions:

9. Comparing offers

Not all offers are made equal — in fact, they are intentionally confusing. At Google, you may get a front-loaded vesting schedule on your stock; at Amazon, sizable cash bonuses the first two years. It seems obvious that you should look at the comp, but that’s not everything:

  • Which company has a better trajectory?
  • How do promotions work?
  • Is your manager influential enough to pull for you when needed?
  • Is your product or team visible enough to get good resourcing?
  • What’s the company brand worth to your earnings trajectory?

TL;DR: Getting paid more up-front doesn’t always mean you’ll make the most overall. Plan carefully.

10. Time to make an ask

It can be awkward to ask for more money, but trust me, everyone expects you to do it. On top of that, it doesn’t help that so much of the advice out there is conflicting. Let’s set the record straight:

“I need a competing offer.”

MYTH: You absolutely do not need multiple offers. Just being able to say you’re speaking to other companies is sufficient — you can quote the expected salaries for other roles if needed.

“I need to provide copies of my other offers.”

MYTH: Nope, nope, nope (even though Google in particular loves to ask for them). You signed an NDA before every interview, so you can always use that as a reason.

“I should send the recruiter an email with my ask and justification.”

MYTH: Negotiating via email = MAJOR CRINGE and definitely a worse outcome. I know there are folks selling fill-in-the-blank templates out there. My advice if you want a meaningful/large increase is to have the conversation over the phone.

“If I find a number online, I can quote it as a reason to get more.”

MYTH: Nothing boils a recruiter’s blood more than “It says X on Glassdoor.” Compensation is an exact science — have arguments prepared that are specific to your situation.

“The best way to get more is to reiterate how qualified I am.”

MYTH: You already got interviewed and everyone’s read your resume. That’s how you got your initial offer; now you need to build additional arguments. Use the information you collected during the interview about what challenges the team is facing — maybe that increases the scope of the role? Discuss why leaving your current role will be hard — are you critical to your current team? In other words: instead of asking for money, make them give you more money by bringing in obstacles the recruiter needs to overcome to close you.

“I need to be aggressive and threaten to walk if they don’t match.”

MYTH: LOL, let me know how that goes for you. My guess is you’ll get a mediocre increase worded as a “final offer.” If you want big moves, I’m talking $100K+ more, you need to collaborate with your recruiter, not make them an enemy.

As a final word of wisdom: Start with negotiating your overall compensation, not individual components. For example, ask for “500K” and then the next round ask “Can I have X more equity?” Then, when you’ve exhausted all other avenues, ask for a signing bonus. If you still need more help, you can always read our guide.

Now that you’ve got all these RSUs in your compensation…

If your new RSUs are more than 10% of your liquid net worth, you should make a plan to diversify ASAP. Holding a concentrated position can translate into greater portfolio volatility, which has been shown to reduce compounded growth rates and future wealth. At Candor we help you automate RSU diversification by converting your stock weekly, even during blackout periods. You can find us here.

Thanks, Niya!

Till next week, and have a fulfilling and productive week 🙏

🔥 Featured job opportunities

  1. Highlight: Founding Blockchain Engineer (Remote-Global)
  2. Pinpoint: Product Manager (Remote-Global)
  3. Aescape: Product Management Lead (Brooklyn, NY)
  4. Mynd: Senior Growth Product Manager (Remote-US)
  5. Mynd: Product Lead, Internal Tools (Remote-US)
  6. CHPTR: Founding Back-End Engineer (Remote-US)
  7. Permutive: Senior Product Manager (NYC)
  8. CloudTrucks: Product Manager-Console (SF)
  9. Fairchain: Software Engineer, Full Stack (NYC)
  10. HomeLight: Senior Product Manager, Listing Management (SF, Phoenix, Seattle)
  11. Perfect Recall: Founding Fullstack Engineer (Waterloo)
  12. Spatial: Backend Engineer (Remote-US)

Browse more open roles, or add your own, at Lenny’s Job Board.

 

By: Lenny Rachitsky

Guest post by Niya Dragova, co-founder of Candor

Source: The 10 commandments of salary negotiation – by Lenny Rachitsky – Lenny’s Newsletter

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The Role of Empathy In Improving Patient Care and Decreasing Medical Liability

Studies reveal that more than half of all practicing physicians demonstrate signs of burnout. Contemporary physicians face tremendous pressures due to a confluence of factors, including balancing heavy patient loads within constrained schedules, the increasing complexity of patient health problems, and increasingly burdensome COVID-related documentation requirements.

These circumstances—and more—challenge physician empathy, and even to some extent dampen it even further. Multiple research studies document a decline in empathy that appears to begin in the third year of medical school and persists during residency.  The pandemic has exacerbated this deterioration. In the past, empathy rebounded after the rigors of training were over, but today, empathy needs to be refreshed to help both patients and providers. Physicians who lose sight of the meaning, purpose, and rewards of their roles in patients’ lives suffer more from burnout than those who remain connected to their purpose.

The role of empathy training

In response to patients’ pleas for more empathic care and national media headlines calling for more compassion in medicine, which have been growing since about 2005, empathy training courses grounded in the neuroscience of emotions and emotional intelligence can be helpful. In fact, recent neuroscience research on the brain’s plasticity in up-regulating and down-regulating empathy provided evidence that empathy could be taught.

The research team in the Empathy and Relational Science program at Massachusetts General conducted a study of the effectiveness of the three, 60-minute empathy training courses in physicians. Researchers found statistically significant improvement in patient perception of physician empathy on a validated and reliable empathy rating scale called the “CARE measure.” Another study by the same team show that empathic physician behaviors resulted in higher ratings of both physician warmth and competence.

One of the most frequently asked questions about empathy training is, “Doesn’t this just add even more time to a busy doctor’s day?” Actually, it does not. Empathic care does not have to take more time. Courses on empathy training help health care professionals detect subtle emotional cues and nuances that indicate patient concerns so they can be addressed right away.

In addition, when physicians convey empathy, they put patients at ease, increasing trust in the provider-patient relationship. This creates a dynamic that ensures that small problems are addressed before they become bigger problems. Multiple studies have demonstrated that better medical outcomes are also correlated with strong empathy and relational skills.

Empathy training offers many benefits 

Courses based on empathy research and principles provide training for each of the following predictors of risk of increasing medical professional liability claims:

  1. Physicians’ uncaring attitudes, attitudes of superiority, or callousness
  2.  Communication failures including not listening, interrupting, or not being clear about availability or backup coverage
  3. Disparagement of previous care
  4. Failure to learn and manage patient expectations

Physicians can learn how to perceive patient emotions, manage difficult interactions, and communicate bad news. Empathy education teaches how to respond with empathy and compassion even in challenging situations, including informed consent conversations and inter-team conflicts.

In addition to greater patient satisfaction, doctors also discover the personal satisfaction that connecting with their patients in a more meaningful way provides.  “After empathy training, I feel that I like my work again, and instead of resenting all the demands, I’m remembering why I chose this profession in the first place,” a physician reported.

Interviews and research around empathy-based practices reveal that greater empathy not only improves patient satisfaction, but also helps to reduce physician burnout and improve physician job satisfaction. By using empathy-based skills, physicians, nurses, and other providers become more attuned to the needs of patients and their families. With this greater perception and shifts in attitudes, communication between providers and patients improves.

More empathic conversations will enable patients to trust their care to physicians who are confident in their skills without demeaning prior care they may have received. Patients will appreciate physicians who explain things clearly, ask about and understand their expectations, and form alignment about what is desired, likely, and possible.

Empathy-based training brings rewards

Through empathy-based training, physicians and other health care providers learn the skills to have honest informed consent discussions without causing undo fear, while also preparing patients for all possible outcomes. Empathic skills make for better physicians, better communications, and better conversations for all outcomes.

With a strong alliance, a reduction in medical professional liability claims is the result of increased trust, better understanding and expectations of all possible outcomes, and knowledge that physicians deeply care about their patients, because, when it comes to health care, empathy matters.

Helen Riess is a psychiatrist and author of The Empathy Effect: Seven Neuroscience-Based Keys for Transforming the Way We Live, Love, Work, and Connect Across Differences. This article originally appeared in Inside Medical Liability.

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Want to Raise Successful Kids? Science Says These 5 Habits Matter Most

I’ve been on a mission, collecting science-based parenting advice both here in my column on Inc.com and in my continuously updated free e-book How to Raise Successful Kids, which you can download here.

Here’s a short but detailed look at five of the most useful studies that I’ve found, and the habits they suggest for successful parents.

1. Be a role model (but not their only role model).

Let’s give the plot twist up front: Kids need great role models, but one of the most important roles you can model is how you deal with failure.

Deal with it honestly, openly, and transparently. Let them see that you do sometimes try and come up short. Because, of course, they will fail at things themselves, and you want to teach them two things:

  • Don’t be afraid or ashamed of failure, especially if they’ve given it their all.
  • Rebound from it the right way.

A few years ago, researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology ran experiments with children as young as 15 months old. The more their parents let them see that they struggled and failed at times, the more resilient the kids became.

“There’s some pressure on parents to make everything look easy,” one of the study’s leads said. “[T]his does at least suggest that it may not be a bad thing to show your children that you are working hard to achieve your goals.”

Beyond that? Make sure they have great role models, both in their lives and in literature.

2. Teach them to love the outdoors.

This advice seems especially timely as we emerge from the pandemic. But kids need to be outside.

Studies show that kids who spent a lot less time outdoors during the early days of the coronavirus crisis experienced a strikingly negative effect on their emotional well-being.

This almost seems like common sense, but we see it come up again and again in both children and adults.

These kinds of habits — and a lifelong appreciation for nature (or not) — can start young, and cost almost nothing.

Against this — and I’m no Luddite, and I know we live in a digital world, but — researchers have found that happiness and well-being among U.S. middle schoolers has declined steadily since 2012.

Hmmm, what happened in 2012? That’s when American kids largely started to get their own smartphones, combined with unlimited data plans.

3. Teach them to prioritize kindness.

A couple of years ago, psychologist and business school professor Adam Grant and his wife, Allison Sweet Grant, wrote a book about kids and kindness. In an article they wrote for The Atlantic around the same time, they made an interesting point:

  • More than 90 percent of U.S. parents say that “one of their top priorities is that their children be caring.”
  • But if you ask children what their parents’ top priorities are for them,  “81 percent say their parents value achievement and happiness over caring.”

There’s a disconnect. And it might stem from people not realizing one of the most fascinating paradoxes, which is that people who demonstrate kindness and caring for others are often more likely to achieve what they want as a result.

As the Grants put it:

Boys who are rated as helpful by their kindergarten teacher earn more money 30 years later. Middle-school students who help, cooperate, and share with their peers also excel–compared with unhelpful classmates, they get better grades and standardized-test scores.

The eighth graders with the greatest academic achievement, moreover, are not the ones who got the best marks five years earlier; they’re the ones who were rated most helpful by their third-grade classmates and teachers.

And middle schoolers who believe their parents value being helpful, respectful, and kind over excelling academically, attending a good college, and having a successful career perform better in school and are less likely to break rules.

We see this in negotiations, too: Develop empathy with the people you’re dealing with, care legitimately about what they want as well as what you want, and you’re more likely to reach a desirable resolution.

4. Praise them the right way.

There are at least three facets of praising kids well that I’ve found in my surveys of the research.

The first is to praise kids for their effort, not their gifts. I’ve gotten a bit of pushback on this idea recently, which I’ll address in a future column. But in short:

  • Good: I’m very proud of you. I saw how hard you studied for that test.
  • Not-so-good: I knew you’d do well on that test. You’re so smart and naturally good at math.

The second is to praise them authentically. Kids aren’t stupid (mostly). They know if you’re blowing smoke when you praise them for things that don’t really merit praise. But they also need reinforcement to know that you’re proud and think they’re doing the right things.

In one study of 300 kids, researchers found that:

When parents perceived that they over- or underpraised their children for schoolwork, children performed worse in school and experienced depression to a greater extent, as compared with children whose parents thought their praise accurately reflected reality.

Finally, however: Be generous with your praise in terms of quantity.

A three-year study out of Brigham Young University found that there’s no magic amount of praise, but it’s helpful to do so as often as possible. One trick might be to break down tasks and praise for each one specifically, as opposed to holding your positive reinforcement until the end of a task.

5. Be there for them, and then some.

This last bit of advice is perhaps the hardest because it flies in the face of one of the parenting clichés we all want to avoid: namely, becoming a helicopter parent.

That said, I’m going to combine studies here, and at least give you food for thought — if not a complete guide.

The bottom line up front is to be there, be vocal, and be involved, while still letting your kids do for themselves as much as they can.

  • Study No. 1: Researchers found that girls whose mothers “nagged the heck out of them” were less likely to become pregnant as teenagers, more likely to go to college, and less likely to have long periods of unemployment or get stuck in dead-end jobs.
  • Study No. 2: A series of studies, actually, found that parents who were quick to run to their children’s side when they faced big challenges or had setbacks — at almost any age — wound up raising kids who were more successful and had better relationships with their parents as they got older.

In short, you’re your child’s parent, and they need you to act like that: guiding them, pushing them, and showing that you’ll always be there for them. Do that much, and you’re doing quite a lot.

By: Bill Murphy Jr., http://www.billmurphyjr.com@BillMurphyJr

Source: Want to Raise Successful Kids? Science Says These 5 Habits Matter Most | Inc.com

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Critics:

Parenting or child rearing promotes and supports the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the intricacies of raising a child and not exclusively for a biological relationship. The most common caretaker in parenting is the father or mother, or both, the biological parents of the child in question. However, a surrogate may be an older sibling, a step-parent, a grandparent, a legal guardian, aunt, uncle, other family members, or a family friend.

Governments and society may also have a role in child-rearing. In many cases, orphaned or abandoned children receive parental care from non-parent or non-blood relations. Others may be adopted, raised in foster care, or placed in an orphanage. Parenting skills vary, and a parent or surrogate with good parenting skills may be referred to as a good parent. Parenting styles vary by historical period, race/ethnicity, social class, preference, and a few other social features.

Additionally, research supports that parental history, both in terms of attachments of varying quality and parental psychopathology, particularly in the wake of adverse experiences, can strongly influence parental sensitivity and child outcomes.

Parenting does not usually end when a child turns 18. Support may be needed in a child’s life well beyond the adolescent years and continues into middle and later adulthood. Parenting can be a lifelong process.

Parents may provide financial support to their adult children, which can also include providing an inheritance after death. The life perspective and wisdom given by a parent can benefit their adult children in their own lives. Becoming a grandparent is another milestone and has many similarities with parenting.

See also

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